Look into your Light(Yourself)

My first visual arts curatorial exhibition opens in a week, shockingly I am not nervous. Very excited, very aligned, and possibly quite anxious is how I feel, but all good feelings. This project has been in the works for about a year, and it feels good to finally see something I fought hard to defend and bring to fruition; get its glory. My anxiety-induced question mark is, will the opening reception be well attended? While I know ultimately it does not matter, and concretely, I have little control over that, I cannot help but worry. I assure myself that I would not have come this far to only come this far, and surprisingly, this simple mantra is just the soothing effect I needed. Also, I have other things to spin my wheels about.

There is something rather magnificent about the moment before the moment of victory. The moment when you realize, 'oh my gosh, I am actually going to accomplish this!' That moment is a moment when fear takes a backseat; even if only temporary, that moment is the moment they were talking about when the term carpe diem was given meaning. This moment is a moment that can last far beyond the goalpost if you let it. This was the point when I realized, if I can make one of my dreams come true, then there was nothing really standing in my way but my own shadow. Four years before this point, I was deeply moved by how art speaks in a space. I felt I had the ear and intuition to create [visual] arts experiences as moving as the exhibition I had the pleasure of embracing. So at that moment, I added 'art curator' to my list of titles I would add under my tool belt with no real idea of how to do that except that I would, that I knew for sure. It is funny how life happens; you look up and, you are in the midst of the very things you asked for, with no recollection of how you got from point A to point B. Perhaps that is the magic of our own light. Navigating our darkness, we can find ourselves standing naked and unafraid in all our glory, and we do not feel nervous. Or scared that others are watching because we know what it felt like when no one paid us any mind and now our name, our ancestors will be remembered; by our own bravery.

Now, you get to marvel; there is still work to do, but for now, Spirit says, 'revel in how far you have come. Look up and see that you are amongst the stars. There may still be darkness, but there is also much light.'